How to Help a Loved One Struggling with Their Mental Health

Supporting loved ones through a mental health challenge can be both a meaningful and emotional experience. It’s natural to want to help, but many people aren’t sure what to say, how to approach the situation, or where to draw boundaries. If someone you care about is struggling, here’s how to help in a way that’s compassionate, informed, and sustainable—for both of you.

1. Start by Recognizing the Signs

One of the first steps in offering mental health support is knowing when something is off. Since you know your loved one best, you’re often the first to notice when they aren’t acting like themselves.

Look for subtle but important shifts in behavior:

• Sleeping much more or much less than usual

• Loss of appetite or sudden changes in eating habits

• Withdrawal from activities or people they normally enjoy

• Mood swings, irritability, or seeming emotionally “numb”

Trust your instincts—if their behavior feels out of character, it’s worth checking in.

2. Approaching the Conversation with Care

When someone is struggling, they may not be ready—or willing—to talk about it. That’s why how you approach them matters.

Start by creating a sense of safety. Instead of asking, “Are you okay?” (which can be easy to brush off), ask more open-ended questions like:

• “How have you really been feeling lately?”

• “What’s been weighing on you this week?”

Sometimes the best way to open a door is by inviting them to do something enjoyable—take a walk, grab coffee, or watch a movie. People tend to open up when they feel connected and safe.

3. What Not to Say

Even with the best intentions, certain phrases can do more harm than good:

• “What’s wrong with you?” (sounds accusatory)

• “It’s not a big deal” or “It’ll pass” (minimizes their feelings)

• “When I went through something similar…” (shifts the focus away from them)

Instead, focus on listening. Many people don’t need advice—they need to feel heard. Empathy and presence are often more powerful than solutions.

4. Encouraging Professional Mental Health Support

Wondering how to help someone take the next step toward healing? You can’t force them into therapy, but you can support the idea of getting help.

Here’s how:

• Share helpful resources or articles

• Normalize therapy by mentioning your own positive experiences (if applicable)

• Focus on the benefits of getting support, rather than pointing out what’s “wrong”

It’s important to understand that people will seek help when they’re ready—and not a moment sooner.

5. Everyday Ways to Offer Support

Supporting loved ones doesn’t have to mean big gestures. In fact, consistent, small acts often go the furthest:

• Text them just to say you’re thinking of them

• Call without an agenda—just to chat

• Show interest in their life without focusing only on their mental health

These small check-ins let them know they’re not alone, even if they don’t want to talk about what’s going on.

6. Set Boundaries Without Stepping Away

Providing mental health support doesn’t mean sacrificing your own mental and emotional health. If your loved one’s struggles start to weigh heavily on you, it’s not only okay—it’s important—to set boundaries. A compassionate response like, “I care about you deeply, and I want to support you, but I may not be the best person to help with this part right now,” can protect both your connection and your capacity to show up long-term.

Boundaries aren’t selfish—they’re an essential part of healthy, sustainable support.

7. When You Feel Helpless or Frustrated

It’s incredibly difficult to watch someone you care about struggle with their mental health. You may feel helpless, frustrated, or even guilty for not being able to do more. But one of the most important truths in supporting loved ones is recognizing where your responsibility ends and theirs begins. Real change can’t be forced—it has to come from within. No matter how much you love them, you can’t make someone want help or healing. They have to choose that path for themselves.

What you can do is remain a steady, compassionate presence. Your role isn’t to have all the answers or to “fix” them—it’s to show up, listen, and offer consistent mental health support in a way that’s healthy for you both. Sometimes that looks like planting small seeds of encouragement: sending a thoughtful text, gently reminding them they’re not alone, or simply sitting beside them in silence. Trust that those moments matter.

Let go of the pressure to be the solution. Your love, patience, and presence are already powerful. When they’re ready to seek help, they’ll remember who stood by them—not to fix them, but to walk with them.

8. Know When to Call for More Help

If your loved one talks about suicide, self-harm, or harming others, take it seriously.

• Call 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline in the U.S.)

• Encourage them to go to the ER or a mental health facility

• Stay with them until professional help is available

Safety always comes first.

Supporting loved ones through mental health challenges is an act of deep compassion—but it’s not always easy. Remember, showing up consistently, listening without judgment, and encouraging healthy steps forward all play a powerful role. And don’t forget: you deserve support too.

If you’re unsure where to start, start small. A kind word, an honest question, or simply being present can make all the difference.

Are you or a loved one seeking support? Let our experienced therapists in Cypress, TX, help you! Contact us for a free consult.

Please note the content found on any page of Youngs Counseling, PLLC is intended for informational and educational purposes only. This information is not intended to be clinical advice, nor should it be considered a substitute for therapy, crisis services, or professional advice and treatment.